hear me roar. and bitch. and moan.

dear diary, i have neglected you. there is so much going on in my world and so much has changed, and i have not provided you any of these details. i got the job. YAY ! i love it. it's perfect for me and i'm so proud of myself. it's completely nerve wracking, thinking of how much i have to learn just to get acclimated. then, after i'm acclimated, i get to teach all this brand new knowledge to anyone that needs to know. it's so exciting. i'm moving to a new area. my friend L has a 2nd room and has graciously invited me to be her roomie. it's an area that i am still not sure i want to live in, but i'll be saving so much money, i can't not do it. i've cast my dating net. it's not been successful. i cancelled all but one of the 5 dates i had set up. the one that i did set up was a disaster. more on that later. i don't feel like going into more detail today, so more updates later.

this weekend has been the most exhausting and uplifting weekend i have had in quite some time. maybe ever. i have the most amazing support sytem in the world. sometimes i feel like it's just me against the world, and then the people in my life show me a world so polar opposite from alone, that it brings me to my knees. my friend N has practically dropped a dream job in my lap. she knows i'm not happy where i am now, and i really thought that was originally why she was offering it. as the interview date has drawn closer, my nerves were really making a show. i didn't want to let her down. i didn't want to ruin my chances of getting this job that i want so very badly. one of my concerns was that she was putting this position in front of me because of our friendship. i felt like she completely overestimated my abilities and knowledge. i discussed this with her and she assured me that while we are the best of friends, there's no way she would jeopardize her work...

Dear 2008, Boy, did you rock my world. During your tenure, you brought with you an onslaught of shit. The year started out well enough, with a visit from my brother. We had a great time and bonded even more than we had before. Following that was a really great vacay to Vegas with the girls. I bought a new car (well, new to me). I flew my mom out to LA in April and had a great time with her (shocker). We did LA, Vegas, the coast. Good times. Come August, you hit me with the death of my favorite aunt. On my trip back to Ohio for the funeral, you brought with that a visit from my other brother, whom I hadn't seen in 10 years. Not since that day he pulled a gun on me and held a knife to my throat. Apparently he's found God and wants to make amends. I wasn't ready for that, 2008. I wasn't ready for the breakup with my bf upon my return. I wasn't ready for the complete unsatisfaction in my job to smack me in the face. I wasn't prepared for the undeniabl...